Dean Winchester (deanjwinchester) wrote in snville,
Dean Winchester

Winchesters 2, Hellgates 0

So we just put our second Hellgate outta commission.  Or Sam did.  Or maybe it was Cousin Daisy.  Or the Big Guy (if you believe Gudrun).  Dropped a mountain on it's ass.  (Note to self: Ask Sam if Hellgates have asses.)  Strictly speaking it was a Conduit, not a Hellgate.  Potato potaaaaaato.  What does Gudrun know anyway?  Route 66 from Hell right through to Heaven with Earth just a truckstop along the way. 

Oh yeah, Gudrun's not as dead as we thought she was.  Showed up riding a moonbeam as large as life and twice as annoying and lands right in front of us with a bad ass sword for Volsung - yeah, he's back too - and some freaky Yoda crap for Sammy.  "Use the Force, Sammy..."  Yeah, and did he ever.

I swear to God, that kid's gonna be the death of me.  I mean I never saw anything like that.  Don't think I ever wanna see anything like it again either.  'Cause y'know, I helped change Sam's diapers.  Not recently, but you know what I mean.  To see your baby brother doing what he did today?  I can't...  I don't even...  Man.  I don't think Sam even knew what was going on half the time.  I was kinda glad he had his eyes closed through the whole thing.  I don't know what the hell I woulda done if he'd opened them and they'd been black.  Or worse, yellow.  I know this psychic ninja crap he's got goin' on is supposed to be a good thing (again, if you believe Gudrun), but damnReaping demons?  Controlling earthquakes?  This is my baby brother we're talking about.  It's just not...right.  Need to talk to Dad about it.  Hell, I need to talk to Sammy about it.  But right now?  Not gonna happen.  For once, even Sammy's not hassling me to care and share.

Still, we got outta there alive.  With a cousin we never knew we had.  Sure, she's a freak like Sammy, but who are we to judge huh?  And even though I'll deny ever saying it with my dying breath, I'm glad Gudrun's not dead.  And that she and her blond man-mountain get to ride off into the sunset.

Seriously.  Las Vegas.  Wedding Chapel.  Elvis.  Dude.  That's one wedding I'd wear a monkey suit for.  Valkyrie and Einherjar warrior married by Elvis.  Maybe I oughta go suggest it...

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