May 1st, 2010


It's over...?

So we did it. Somehow. Me 'n Sammy. With a little help. We got Dad out of Stull.

He slept all the way from Lawrence to Bonnie's house. Feel like I could sleep all the way to the Moon and back. Seriously. It's like I've not gotten any zzzzzzz's in the six months he's been trapped down there.

I wish I could lose this feeling like it's not really over though. Yeah, he's back, and it's really him. I don't think Mia was messing with us when she told us that. But it's just... he won't talk to us. Won't tell us what happened to him, what it was like. The things he saw. I know some of it must have been pretty bad. That yellow-eyed sonofabitch wearing my face - till I blew it off - can't have been a picnic. And his version of Sammy? Jeez. The way he looked at me. Made my flesh crawl and the hairs stand up on the back of my neck.

So yeah. I know Dad wasn't on the back nine sipping a brewski with Tiger Woods or nothin'.

But still. Just wish he'd talk to us.

Oh Christ. Now I sound like Sammy.

Who's been...almost as quiet as Dad since we got back. Think it freaked him out even more than it freaked me out when he did his whole reflection thing without having anyone there to reflect. Mia was gone, man. No way that was just her he was mirroring.

Who'd o' thought I'd be the only Winchester doing the "Let's talk about this," crap, huh?

Now I need to go to sleep for twenty years. Hopefully Bonnie's got a good stock of the local beverage of choice here in sunny Lynchburg. If not? The Jack factory is only a mile down the road.
  • Current Music
    Gimme Shelter - Rolling Stones

Back in the land of the - uh - living.

So it feels like someone's been playing soccer with my head.

And now? Now Dean decides he wants me to care and share.

Impeccable timing as always, big bro.

So yeah, I know he wants me to talk about what happened at Stull. And I will. I will. But... I need to get all straight in my own head before I can help him get it straight in his. I know he's worried about me. Hell, when isn't he worried about me? But what I did back there? Even I'm not sure what happened.

Yeah, I could feel Mia's power, just like I have before. And I reflected it back so I could get us the hell outta there. But... I could still feel it. After she was gone. After she was Hellpuppy chow. After I was a couple realities away. How does that happen? How do I explain that? If I'm just a conduit, just a mirror, how did I still have her power after she was dead?

Maybe Dean's right. Maybe I am some kind of psychic "sponge" that can drain the powers out of other people. I don't know. Is that what happened in Fort Worth? Had I somehow stored some of Nathan's whirlwind-making power in me?

I wish there was someone I could talk to about this. Someone else who could do this. But I guess I'm unique. And most of the other psychic kids are dead now. As far as I know.

Maybe I'll try calling Gudrun. She had some idea what was going on with me. Always supposing they get cell reception in Valhalla...

But for right now? I'm liking Dad's plan. Sleep. And radio silence.
  • Current Music
    Fix You - Coldplay